One night I was in the living room watching a movie with most of my cousins and siblings, when I heard Dan talking to Matt in the hallway. "Ready to check the lines, Man?"I looked quickly at my watch and swore under my breath. It was earlier than usual. Their habit of trapping was one of the few bones of contention between me and my brother and cousin.

I quickly grabbed my shoes and pulled them on. "Carrie!" I whispered loudly, "Come here." Intrigued by my summons, my younger sister quickly obeyed, falling to her knees beside me on the floor. "I'll pay you twenty dollars to keep Matt and Dan in the house as long as you can.

"Why?" she asked.

"Forget why. Will you do it?"

"Ok," she shrugged. "Matt!"she called, getting to her feet and going in search of him. I grinned to myself. My kid sister knew what she was doing. She adored Matt and he knew it, and therefore felt somewhat obligated to put up with her. "Matt!" I heard her call again.

"What!? Carrie?" I grinned again at the irritation in his voice, caused by her inconvenient timing.

"Jess!" my younger brother was leaning into me as I finished tying my shoe.

"What Alex?"

"You're not going to mess with the traps are you? It's a bad idea. You know how Dan is about them."

"Alex, I don't have time for a lecture." I got to my feet.

"You're going to make him mad," Alex protested loudly enough for Nate and Sam to catch the drift.

"Matt, won't like it either, Jess," Nate warned.

"Well thank you both for your support!"I snapped. "But I do not like what they're doing and I'm going to stop it, any way I can. Talking to them doesn't work, so this is the only thing I can do."

"I agree with you, Jess." Sam interjected and Nate and Alex shot her a look.

"Well, I do."

"Thanks, Sam. I'll be back. I could hear Carrie still babbling to Matt down in the game room, asking him to fix something or other, he'd promised to fix and I left feeling confident that if I hurried, I'd have time. Usually I gave myself a half hour's head start and it had been no problem to know when to leave as the boys had been checking the lines at the same time every night. Tonight they were a half hour early. I quickened my pace and cringed at the idea that they might already suspect me.

I was at the fifth trap, about half way down the line when I heard them coming up behind me. So far, all the traps had been empty, but this one contained an extremely paniced rabbit and I hesitated. I knew I should make myself scarce and I was on the point of doing so, much to the rabbit's bad luck, when I glanced over and saw three little rabbit noses peeping out of the bushes along the wood lined trail. I picked up the cord leading to the trap and at that moment my brother came around the bend and saw me.

"Shit! I knew it!" He dashed forward in an attempt to stop me, but just before he reached me and grabbed my arms, I raised the trap and, excited by the comotion, it was half a second before the mother rabbit was gone with her children in tow.

"Damb it, Jess! Why do you have to be such a bleeding heart all the time?"

"She had babies, Dan!" My cousin came up next to us and remained quiet, though he seemed aggravated as well.

"I don't care if she had a thousand babies!" Dan snapped. "She was dinner!"

"Oh, forgive me!" I retorted, hurt by his tone. "I forgot we didn't know where our next meal was coming from!"

"Don't turn your sarcasm on me!" Dan bristled.

"Well don't be such a jerk, then!

"Hey! We worked hard on those traps, Jess." Matt intervened on Dan's side and the injury was complete.

"Fine! Do what you want!"I yelled."Go catch your stupid rabbits! Catch the babies and make a pie for all I care! Just don't expect me to eat it!" I ripped myself out of Dan's not so gentle grasp and went running for the house.

"Jess!" Matt called out and his tone was somewhat repentent, but I didn't stop.

"Let her go,"said Dan. "Let's finish checking the traps."

I was crying when I entered the house and naturally I encountered Alex first thing. "They caught up to you, didn't they?"he inquired grimly. "I told you," he said without waiting for my answer.

"Alex, I don't need it right now, ok?" I choked. He had been on his way back into the living room with popcorn, but now Nathan and Sam came out to see what the fuss was. They ascertained as immediately as Alex had, what the trouble was.

"Don't worry about it, Jess," Nate tried to comfort."You know how Matty is. He'll get over it."

"I don't care anyway!" I sulked. "I saved a bunny with three babies from being dinner. That's all I care about! Sam, do you want to go to a movie with me?"

"Sure," she responded eagerly. We had hardly spent any time alone so far. "What do you want to see?"

"I don't really care," I bit my lip and wiped at the last of my tears. "I just want to get out of here. I'm going to go ask my mom." Alex, Nate and Sam exchanged glances as I turned toward the kitchen. It was unusual for me to be so upset with both Dan and Matt at once. In fact I couldn't remember the last time that had happened. "Mamma?"I pushed through the swinging door that led to the kitchen.

"Yeah, sweetie?"

"Will you drive me and Sam to see a movie?"

"Sure. Is everything ok?" She looked at me and tears started to slide down my cheeks again. "The boys getting to you a little bit?"

"Just Matt and Dan and their stupid traps!"I blurted out. She came and wrapped her arms around me.

"I see," her voice was full of sympathetic amusement. "My sweet girl! You are such a tender heart. Always looking out for everyone and everything. I think it would be great for you and Sam both to spend a little time away from the boys. As loveable as they are, they can drive anybody crazy after awhile." I cried harder and she hugged me tight. "Oh, sweetie. Come on, chin up. Everything will be ok." Finally, I started to calm down and she handed me some kleenex. "Ready?" I nodded. "Ok, let me just get my keys. Is Sam ready?"

"I think so." I washed my face quickly at the sink as my mother grabbed her keys and then we left the kitchen. Sam had gone back to watching the movie, along with Alex and Nate, but she got to her feet and came into the hallway when she saw us waiting for her.

Just as we were leaving, the door opened and Matt and Dan came in. They each carried a rabbit and glanced uncomfortably at me. "I see you got your dinner afterall," I hissed. "Enjoy it!"

"Jess, come on. Can we talk?" I could tell I was really hurting my brother's feelings, but I almost didn't care.

"Not now."

"Where are you going?"

"Out."

"To do what?"

"To see a movie."

"Oh yeah? What are you going to see?"

"Nottinghill," I snapped. It was a pointed disinvitation and both Dan and Matt`looked stung.

"All right, then. See you later. . .,"I started to walk past them.

"Jess . . ." Matt tried to call me back, but I just followed my mom out the door.

"See you later guys," Sam said sympathetically. She grabbed her brother's hand on the way out. "Don't worry, she'll get over it." If I could have seen,then, the looks that told how crushed both my cousin and brother were, I would have forgotten about the movie altogether, but I was hurt too, and I just kept walking. It was a critical decision and one that I regreted later when I had heard the details of all that happened in Sam's and my absence.

Dan, feeling angry and hurt, turned towards the kitchen to rid himself of the offending rabbit. My cousin followed him, placing his rabbit next to Dan's on the counter. Then my brother picked up the phone to call Rick Sterling, his best friend. "Hey, man. You goin' tonight?"Pause. "Yeah, well I changed my mind . . .mmhm. Ok. See you there."

"Dan," Matt ventured as my brother hung up the phone. "You're not doing what I think you're doing are you?"

"I don't know. What do you think I'm doing?"

"You're not going dragracing are you?" Matt lowered his voice.

"You want to go?"

"No,Man! Think what you're doing! You know how Jess feels about it. And a lot of her feeling comes from how your dad feels about it!"

"Well, I'm not going to get caught, and Jess isn't here so what she doesn't know won't hurt her."

"Dan, please reconsider!"

"Matt, I appreciate the concern, man, but I'm going."

"Going where?" Nate and Alex had just entered the room and Alex's question was met by silence as Dan started gathering his things.

"No! Dan, please!" My younger brother pleaded.

"Dan, you're not thinking clearly," Nate tried to reason with him.

"Listen guys, I appreciate the advice and I know it's valid, but tonight I'm doing this and no one's going to talk me out of it."

"Jess could have," Alex accused bitterly.

"Yes, well if Jess were here, I probably would not have even thought about going, but she's not is she?"

"Is that what this is about?"Nate asked. "Revenge on your sister? Dan, think about what you're doing, what you're risking."

"I don't want to think about it, Nate. I just want to drive! Last chance. . . .anyone who wants to come." There was silence. "Ok, then, see you all later." Dan walked out leaving Nate, Matt and Alex to stand silently looking after him. The three went back to the movie in an effort to keep their minds off of the events of the night, and an hour or so later, my dad came in with my uncle.

They had been out in town and had stopped by their old haunt for a couple of drinks. Consequently, neither one of them was completely sober as they looked in on the little group gathered around the TV. "What are you all watching?" My dad asked pleasantly.

"Alien Two," Carrie replied.

"Aren't you a little young for that, Sweetie?"

"No!" She glowered. My dad and uncle laughed.

"Where is everyone?" There was no answer,and my dad became suspiscious.

"Where are Dan, Jess and Sam?"

"They went to a movie," Matt said after a minute. Nate and Alex looked at him uncomfortably, and my father narrowed his eyes.

"And you all stayed here?"

"Well it seemed a little pointless to go out when we had a good movie to watch right here," Matt responded a little defensively. It worked.

"Ok, I was just wondering," my dad replied. The six of you are so often attached at the hip." No response.

"Ok, well enjoy your movie," and with that my dad and uncle left them to themselves.

Meanwhile, Sam and I were in high spirits as we exited the cinema admist a throng of girls, mostly our age. It had been good to spend time away from the boys. It was a beautiful night out. The air was warm and there was just a little breeze. We had seen Nottinghill, a movie that we could not have dragged the boys kicking and screaming to,and that was gratifying. Now, as the movie let out, however, I was beginning to think with some regret of the sharpness with which I had addressed my brother and cousin.

"God, Sam! I was such a bitch!" I said as we stepped from the theater into the comparitevely warm, sticky air. "Do you think they're still mad?"

"Are you kidding me?" She replied, laughing a little. "They weren't mad when we left. Jess, if you had seen their faces as we walked out the door, I wouldn't have gotten you as far as the car. It was enough to break your heart, looking at the two of them." The reflection, comforting as it was meant to be, brought no satisfaction and I felt sorrier than ever about the way I had acted. "Don't worry about it, Jess," my cousin comforted, "you know how easily those two bounce back! And look at it this way, if this hadn't happened, I might never have gotten you to myself at all this summer." I smiled weakly at her, and she looked at her watch. "Come on," she said, grabbing my hand, "we have a little time. Let's get some ice cream." We walked to the Ben and Jerry's next to the theater and after purchasing the cones we sat at one of the picnic tables outside, giggling and flirting with the junior and senior boys who were hanging around. Laughingly, we rated them as they walked by us. Some of them were friends with Dan, Nate and Matt and they stopped to talk to us. They approached us differently than they did when we were with our brothers and cousins and Sam and I talked with satisfaction about how upset Nate and Dan would be if they knew.

After a few minutes, we walked backed to the theater where we had agreed to meet my mom. We continued to flirt as we walked, and now, as we sat on the curb licking our ice cream and looking for my mom's car, we turned more than a few heads, something that never happened when Matt, Nate and Dan were with us. I grinned to think how incensed Dan would be, and contemplated whether or not to tell him. Then I thought silently of moments like this that I had missed during the year that Sam was gone, and as I thought of her leaving again when summer was over, my mood fell a little. I had other friends, close friends even, but Sam was my cousin. I had grown up with her. She knew my family inside out. We had shared everything.

"A penny for your thoughts," Sam spoke softly. She was licking some ice cream that had started to melt off the side of her cone, but she turned her eyes on me.

I sighed,"I was just thinking how much I'm going to miss you when you have to leave again."

"That's why you have to help me convince my dad to move back here."

"Is that a real possibility?" I asked, feeling my hopes start to rise.

Sam shrugged. "Dad says no, but I think he wants to come back. He knows how much Matt, Nathan and I have missed you guys, and the truth is I think he's missed having your dad around, a lot more than he thought he would." She was silent for a moment and then when she spoke her voice was quiet and bitter. "Honestly, I think if it weren't for Cynthia we'd already be back, but she doesn't want to move and neither do Amy and Sean."

"Are you serious?!"I stopped licking the ice cream to look at her and after a minute, it started to run down my hand. Sam looked back at me and I knew from her expression that she couldn't be more in earnest."

"I think," she went on as her ice cream started to drip as well,"that some of Matt's problems with Cynthia stem from the fact that he has been more vocal than either Nate or I have been." She paused to let her words sink in and I felt the muscles in my stomach tighten. "Matt has been constantly after my Dad to move back here. He's got him thinking about it all the time and Cynthia wants my dad to forget about it. That's why I think, even though my dad would never admit it, that this summer is a sort of trial to see how things go."

I was still processing this information when my mom pulled up. Sam and I got in the car silently, but as we drove out of the theater some of the boys who had been talking to us waved. Chris Sly, one of Dan's best friends, even blew me a kiss which gave me butterflies and I giggled, imagining Dan's expression. Sam's spirits rose too, as the boys continued to flirt and wave, and by the time we pulled up in front of the house we had all but forgotten the serious nature of our last conversation.

We entered the house noisily, and were met by my dad. "Well girls, did you have a good time?"

"Did we?" Sam giggled.

"How could we not?" I traded meaningful looks with her.

"Oh, yeah?" My dad smiled and raised his eyebrows."Good movie?"

"The movie was good, but after was better,"I responded. Sam laughed. My dad chose not to probe farther.

"What did you see?"he asked.

"Nottinghill,"I replied.

"Really,"my dad frowned and seemed puzzled, as my mother made her appearence in the kitchen, placing her keys in her pocket book and stowing her pocketbook in its place on the counter, near the door. "Where's Dan? Didn't he drive?" I saw my mother look up in surprise and I looked curiously back at my father.

"Dan didn't go with us,"I returned, and I knew I had made a mistake as I saw my dad's expression change.

"Really," he said again. "Matthew, Alexander, Nathan, Get in here!"

"Dad, what's wrong?" He ignored me. I looked at Sam and her expression reflected the fear that was now making my stomach churn. A moment later the boys pushed through the kitchen door and upon seeing me and Sam all three turned deathly white.

"Alex, where is your brother?" Alex swallowed and looked at me for help, but I was confused and didn't know what to say. Matt put a hand on Alex's shoulder and he looked back at my dad without answering. "All right! The three of you, upstairs, Now! We are going to get some answers." The boys turned to obey and as they left the kitchen I looked at my dad.

"Dad, what's going on?" I asked again. He was silent.

"Steven?" my mother prompted.

"That is precisely what I'm going to find out," he replied, as he pushed through the door into the hallway. Sam and I followed him. He turned towards the closet where he kept his belts and Sam grabbed my hand.

"Oh God, Jess!"I squeezed her hand.

"Stall him as long as you can," I whispered. "I'm going to find out what's going on." She nodded and took off after my dad. I headed up the stairs.

"Uncle Steve, please!"I heard Sam below.

"Don't start Samantha!"

"But what did they do?"

"They lied to me!"

I didn't hear anymore as I pushed open the door to the boys' room and stepped inside. I didn't have a lot of time. The boys were sitting together on Dan's bed. They looked terrified. Alex jumped up and ran to me. I wrapped him in my arms and held him."You guys are about to be in a lot of trouble," I said softly. "Where is he?"

"He went dragracing," Matt returned bitterly.

"What!? Oh my God!"Alex started to cry. I tightened my arms around him. "All right, well, if my dad threatens to take the belt to you, you have to tell him, guys! Dan would not want you to get in trouble over him."

There was silence, and then finally Matt spoke up, "We're already in trouble, Jess."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Why?"

"I told your Dad that Dan was with you and Sam."

"Oh Matt! Oh no! Why would you do that?"

"I don't know," Matt bit his lip and tears welled in his eyes. "It was all I could think of to keep your dad from getting suspiscious." He looked so vulnerable and I wanted to go to him, but I could not bring myself to leave Alex as we heard Sam and my father coming up the stairs.

"Uncle Steve, please!" Sam was desperately trying to slow him down.

"Sam, I do not want to hear it!"

"But maybe they really don't know where he is! Maybe they really thought he was with us . . ."

"Oh, Balogna! Your brother told me a bold faced lie." Then my uncle's voice reached us from below.

"Samantha! Come down here and stay out of the way!"I looked at Matt and Nate. They were both trying not to cry.

"Daddy please!"

"Let's Go! Right now! Where is Jess?" Sam was silent. "Jessica!" My uncle called. I didn't answer. "Let's go, girls! Do not make me come up there!" I started to move, but Alex clung to me and I didn't have the heart to pull away. The next moment, a sudden commotion from Carrie's room took my father and uncle's immediate attention away from me and Sam. There was a crash and some shouting and as words became clearer we all froze.

"Amy, no!" screamed Carrie.

"Amy, do not do this!" Toby warned. "You think everyone hates you now, but if you do this no one will ever forgive you!"

"How can you be on their side?!" Amy hissed. "They are not very nice to any of you."

"And what do you know about it!?" Dennis snapped.

"Yeah," Carrie added. "Dan and Jess can be a pain sometimes, but they are our big brother and sister and sometimes they are really nice and sometimes I do not know what any of us would do without them." She started to cry."You don't know our father, Amy." Then she lowered her voice and I could just make out what she said. "We do not tell on each other in this family!"

"Well I don't care, I'm not part of this family." There was more crashing and then Toby spoke again, trying unsuccessfully to keep his voice low.

"Amy, please try to get what we're saying. You think my uncle has a temper, but it's nothing compared to my father's." More crashing.

"Amy please!"

"Well what about Alex and your cousins? You think they should take the heat for something Dan did?" Carrie started to cry harder.

"Don't you get it?" Dennis demanded. "Matt, Nate and Alex are already gonna get it. They lied to our father! You are just going to get them in worse trouble and you're going to get Dan in trouble too, so their effort will have been for nothing."

It was at this point that my father intervened, opening the door to Carrie's room and confronting his three youngest children. "Speaking of lying, Dennis, if you boys have known all along where your brother is, how come this is the first I'm hearing of it?"

"We didn't know," Toby responded hotly. "Not until Amy spilled it just now."

"All right, Amy," my dad turned to her, "you wanted the spotlight. Now you've got it. Where is my son?" There was a long silence and Nate, Matt, and I looked at one another nervously. Alex pressed his wet face against my shoulder and grew quiet. I let my chin fall to the top of his head and I held him close as we all listened and waited. "Well?" My father repeated. "It's the moment you've been waiting for. The floor is yours. So let's have it."

"I just feel like you have the right to know what your son is doing."

"Oh, please . . .!"Toby scoffed.

"That's enough, Toby," my father warned. "I agree with you, Amy. I would dearly like to know what my oldest son is up to, since everyone else seems to feel such a need for secrecy. So, where is he?"

"I heard him tell Matt he was going dragracing," Amy said finally, but her voice was hesitant and timid.

"He did WHAT!!!!!??? Rob!!!" My father threw open the door to the boys' room making us all jump. In two strides my father crossed the room and took my brother by the arm.

"No Daddy!" I pleaded. My father ignored me and tried to pull my brother away. I held on. He glared at me.

"Don't you start! I have no patience, Jess! Let go!" Alex pressed closer to me as my father dropped his arm temporarily, and I held tighter. "You have until I count to ten to let go, Young Lady, or you are going to get it too! ONE . . .!" I pressed my face against the top of Alex's head, holding him tightly. "TWO . . ." I felt Matt's arms come around me, as he gently attempted to break the hold I had on my brother. "THREE . . ."

"Come on, Man," my cousin addressed my brother. "You don't want your sister to be in trouble too do you?"

"FOUR. . . "I felt Alex shake his head.

"Then you need to let go, Bud!" Matt commanded gently, because you know she never will." Alex's grip loosened slightly and as it did Matt succeeded in separating us and my father pounced. Seizing Alex by the arm once more, he dragged him toward his bed.

"I'm sorry, Daddy! I'm sorry, please!!!" Alex begged. My father sat down on the bed and without taking a minute to respond, pulled my younger brother over his knee. Alex clutched the bedspread and hid his face, as my father raised his t shirt, exposing the seat of his jeans. I then turned on my cousin as my father began to spank, his hand coming down hard over and over again.

"Why did you do that, Matt?" I sobbed, but I already knew the answer and as I looked at his face all my anger melted away. He folded me in his arms and I pressed my face against his chest.

"I'm sorry, Jess!For everything!" I was unable to respond, so Matt just held me. My brother squirmed as my father continued to spank him. He was trying to be brave in front of our cousins, but finally he began to cry out.

"Oww! Daddy, oww! Please! I'm sorry!" He was twisting and turning to get away from my father's hand as it fell again and again, relentlessly smacking his bottom.

"I'm glad you're sorry Alex! You lied to me, Son, and I imagine you're going to be a lot more sorry before we're through." My brother tried to reach back but my father grabbed his wrist, pinning it to his back and continuing the punishment. Ten minutes later when Alex was sobbing with both wrists pinned to his back, too exhausted to struggle much more, my father finished with ten extra hard swats that all landed in the center of Alex's burning bottom and then let him up. Alex grabbed his bottom immediately and began to rub as he stood looking sorrowfly at my father, tears streamig down his face. My father looked sternly at him, "Now, you are going to come with me to get your brother and when we get back the five of us," he paused to glance at my cousins, "are going to have a little conversation about honesty out in the barn. Is that understood?"

"Daddy, can't I wait here?"

"No, Alex!" my father's voice grew impatient. "I need you to show me where Dan is."

"Please don't make me, Daddy! I don't want to." Alex started to cry hard again.

"Don't you think you've had enough trouble today? Why do you want to invite more?"

"I don't, but . . ."

"No buts! Let's go."

"Daddy please!"

"Alex!" my father got to his feet.

"I want to stay here!" Alex remained stubborn and I became anxious, pulling away from my cousin.

My father bent low to peer into Alex's petrified face."You are coming with me to get your brother! And you had better start cooperating with me or you are both going to regret it!" My father was pulling Alex toward the door before I found my voice.

"Daddy please!"

"Do not mess with me, Jess! I've had all I can take!" I looked desperately at Matt and Nathan, but they both looked away. I knew they did not know the details of where Dan was, or they would have intervened already. My father paused just at the door and looked hard at my cousins. "You boys be on the porch when I get back! Do not make me come inside for you!" With that he hauled my little brother out of the room and down the stairs. I followed them closely.

"Daddy, Please! I want to go too!"

"Stay out of it Jessica!" We were now downstairs and my uncle was waiting in the hall. My father continued out the door with Alex in tow. I tried to follow, but my uncle interceded, blocking my way to the door.

"Jess, let it go! Your father is already very angry! Don't make it worse!”

"But Uncle Rob . . ." I was sobbing so hard I couldn't say anything more and after a minute my uncle turned to follow my father and Alex who were now waiting in my father's truck. Heedless of my uncle's advice, I once again attempted to follow, but this time Sam pulled me back. I had not even heard her come down.

"Sam . . .don't!" I tried to pull away.

"Jess, you've got to let them go! Anything you do is just going to make it worse for both Alex and Dan!"

"I can't Sam! Alex . . . is so devoted to Dan . . ."I couldn't finish. She was grasping my arms now, but I desperately twisted and pulled until I managed to break free.

"NATE!!" Sam shouted for her brother. I ran for the door, but did not make it farther than the porch steps before Nate's strong arms caught me, lifting me off my feet.

I pulled against him. "Let me go, Nate!" I screamed, twisting and wriggling to no avail. With helpless horror I watched my father back up and pull out of the driveway. "Alex!!!"

I continued to fight my cousin until the truck was out of sight and his soft voice reached my ears."You've got to let it go, Baby Girl. This isn't doing anyone any good, not your brothers and especially not you. Come on now . . .," he paused. "What would Dan tell you to do?" The gentle tone of his voice and the impact of his words caused me to sag in defeat. I clutched his arms and leaned against him, sobbing. He stroked my hair, brushing it away from my hot forehead and as I sank to the porch he gathered me in his arms and kissed the top of my head. I was no longer capable of speaking and I just cried on his shoulder as he held me.

Dimly, I heard the door creak as Sam stepped out onto the porch. She didn't say anything, but sat down on the swing next to Matt who had come out with Nate, in case his brother had been unable to restrain me on his own. Matt had been silent up to now, but now his soft drawl broke the silence, and just hearing his voice was a comfort. "Alex is a tough little guy, Jess. He'll be ok."

“I'm afraid he's going to try and be too tough,"I sobbed and I felt Nate's gentle hand pause on the back of my head. I knew my cousins were worried about that too. They didn't have to say so and for a moment nobody spoke.

"They'll be ok, Jess," Nate's quiet voice broke the silence. He knew that I had more than just Alex on my mind now. "We'll all be ok."

Sam started to cry, and without another word, Matt put his arm around her and pulled her against him.

The wait for my dad and uncle to return with my brothers was excruciating. Finally, however, my father pulled into the driveway and my uncle pulled up beside him in Dan's truck. I got to my feet as my dad turned the engine off, but was hesitant to approach the truck. I wanted to see my brothers, but I felt weird. I didn't know how they would react to seeing me, especially Dan.

I walked slowly over as the passenger side door opened. Alex was the first one out and he ran to me, throwing his arms around my neck, and sobbing. I felt tears start to slide down my face again as I wrapped him in my arms and held him. The actions of my little brother relieved most of my awkwardness and I steeled myself for the encounter with my older brother as he stepped out of the truck and shut the door. He looked at me with red rimmed eyes and I looked back. I could tell by the way he was standing that my father had already been after him with the belt and I bit my lower lip to keep from losing it completely.

At that moment, the driver's side door slammed and my father came around the truck to address my brothers and cousins who were still on the porch. "You all have the time it takes me to go inside and get what I need. When I come back the five of us are going to take a little walk. You boys be ready!"

Then my uncle came up beside him, and the two of them headed inside, my uncle stopping only to scold Matt and Nathan. "You boys really screwed up tonight! If I hear of you lying again to either me or your uncle, the three of us are going to have our own separate conversation! Is that understood?"

"Yes sir," Nate replied. Matt remained silent.

"Matthew, is that clear?"

"Yes," he returned obnoxiously.

"You better watch your step, Boy! You are treading on very thin ice! And for someone who wants to move back here so bad, you are not making a very good case for yourself!" Without waiting for Matt's response, my uncle continued into the house in the wake of my father and Matt placed his head in his hands.

Dan and I had been watching the scene between my uncle and cousins, but now we looked again at one another. "I'm sorry, Jess," my brother said huskily.

"Oh, Dan, I'm sorry too! If I had known how upset you were, I wouldn't have gone out tonight." He looked away, trying to keep control, and when he looked back he addressed Matt who had come up behind me. "I'm so sorry man, I didn't mean to get everybody in trouble." He broke down, putting his hands over his face and sliding against the truck until he was sitting on the ground. Sam, anticipating my desire to go to him came up next to me and readily took my younger brother into her arms as I let him go.

I sat down beside Dan and put my arm around him. He leaned into me, burying his face in my chest and letting go. "Hey Man, it's all right," Matt spoke up softly. "It's as much my fault as yours. I'm sure we all would have made different decisions if we knew how things would turn out, but we can't go back. At least we're all in this together."

Just then there was a scream from the house. "No! Daddy Please! Please!" It was Carrie.

"Carrie, No! Stop!" came the horrified cry from one of the twins.I exchanged fearful looks with my cousins, and Nathan, who was still on the porch, turned to peer inside.

"Shit!" He muttered as he turned back to face us. His face was ashen, and he didn't need to explain, as the next second brought my father through the screen door onto the porch. He was dragging Carrie on one arm where she had attached herself in an effort to slow him down and in his other hand, he was carrying the cane. He had bought the dreaded implement to use on me, Matt and Dan the day we were caught skipping school four years ago. He had used it only once since then, on Dan and Nathan when they had smarted off, in defense of me and Matt. Both days had been terrible, but I had not realized how vivid they were, even in my kid sister's memory. Carrie had been only six the first time and eight the second.

"Daddy! Daddy, please . . ." Carrie continued to scream and clutch at his arm. Her crying was the only thing to be heard as we all looked on in stunned silence. Dan grew quiet as he looked up at her and the rest of us were too shocked to move. "Please Daddy! It won't happen again, please!! I know it won't!! Please don't do this!!" My dad tried to reach for Nathan, who was still sitting on the porch steps, but Carrie blocked his way, still clinging. "No! Daddy . . .!"

"Carrie!" My dad eyed her sternly. "I expect this kind of crap from Samantha and Jessica, but not from you! Go inside and mind your business!!" He tried to shake her off.

"But Daddy . . .!!" Her sobs drowned out her voice and finally Nate stood up to intervene.

"Carrie, don't get yourself in trouble. We'll be ok."

"How touching," my dad retorted, taking hold of Nate's arm.

"No!! Daddy Please!!" Carrie screamed, wrapping her arms around him and begging.

"Well, I see you've learned quite a lot from your sister and cousin, Carrie, but apparently what you've failed to notice, is that they only ever make the situation worse. Now go inside!!" At that moment the screen door opened and Dennis and Toby stepped out, looking shaken, but determined. They each took Carrie by an arm and together managed to pry her off my father. She fought them as they hauled her back towards the door. They were stronger than she was by quite a bit and yet she almost got free more than once.

"Let me go!!" She screamed. "Please!! Dennis! Let me go!!" She continued to wiggle and appeal to first one then the other of the twins, but to no avail. Dennis finally turned her over completely to Toby, the stronger of the two, and opened the screen door again. Toby then half lifted, half dragged Carrie, still fighting back into the house. I felt tears starting to streak my cheeks again as the door closed behind my younger siblings, and I saw Mama come up and take my younger sister in her arms. Carrie clung to her and sobbed. "Please don't let him, Mama, Please! You've got to stop him!! You know Aunt Rebecca wouldn't have let Daddy do this!! Please!"

"Oh, Honey!" Mama tightened her arms around her, "I'm not sure that even Aunt Rebecca would have tried to stop your father this time. What your brother did was very dangerous, Carrie, and Alex and your cousins covered for him. A lot of people could have been hurt, Sweetheart." I looked at my brothers and cousins. Carrie and Mama's words affected them all. Even Nate put his hand over his eyes, and tears started to streak Matt's face. Alex, who had been shocked into silence with the rest of us by Carrie's outburst, began to cry quietly again and Sam hugged him tightly as tears silently trickled down her own face. Dan remained quiet, but he clutched me tighter, and I could feel his tears dropping onto my neck, so I knew that he was crying again too.

"He could ground them, or take away their allowance, Mama. Anything, please!!" She continued to sob and the boys all started to cry harder as they listened.

"Let's go boys!" My dad commanded sternly. He ushered Nathan down the stairs and then let him go, giving him a little shove in the direction of the barn. Nathan did his best to pull himself together and then kept walking, stopping only to collect his brother.

"Come on, Bro," he said quietly, placing a hand on Matt's shoulder, "let's get it over with." Matt nodded through his tears, and then looking once at me and Dan, he followed his brother.

"Alex, Dan, Now! Let's go!!" Alex finally lifted his face from Sam's shoulder and wiped quickly at his tears as our father came up beside them. My dad took him by the arm, and pulled him away from Sam. Then with a light swatt of the cane across his bottom, he sent him scurrying after my cousins. "Dan, don't make me say it again!!" My brother was, uncharacteristically, still clinging to me. He had not even looked up. I knew he was scared. It was not clear whether my dad would use the cane on Nathan, Matt and Alex, but it was certain he would use it on Dan. When my brother still didn't respond, my father reached down and grabbed his arm, jerking him roughly to his feet.

"Oww!! Daddy, I'm sorry!!"

"You are in enough trouble, Son! If I were you, I would start cooperating with me!" My father kept hold of Dan's arm, manhandling him in the direction of the barn. My cousins and Alex were just ahead of them. I ran to keep up and Sam came behind me.

"Daddy, please!" I pleaded, mindful of the response my sister had gotten, but still feeling I had to try.

"Jess, just shut your mouth right now! I do not want to hear it, and I am giving you fair warning!"

"But Daddy," I sobbed.

"No 'Buts' Jess! I mean it!"

"But, it's my fault!"

"Oh? And how's that?"

"Dan and I had a fight earlier tonight! That's why Sam and I went out. I was mad and really mean, and I really hurt Dan's feelings, and you know how he gets when he's hurt, Daddy! He would never have gone, tonight, if he hadn't been upset with me!"

"Oh, Please Jessica! I'm sorry to hear that you and your brother were fighting! But you are not his keeper, and you are not responsible for his actions!"

"But the whole thing wouldn't have happened if it weren't for me!" I screamed. I clutched my father's arm as the barn came in sight, but my father shook me off and kept going. "Daddy!" I sobbed. "It won't happen again! Please! They're already scared!Can't you see? Isn't that enough? Like Carrie said, you can ground them, or take away their allowance or something else, anything else! They won't do it again! I promise!Please . . .!"

With that my father let go of my brother and turned on me. "Jess, I can understand how your feelings for your brothers and cousins are leading you to that misguided bit of logic you just spouted. It is, nevertheless, clear to me who the guilty parties are and where the punishment should be bestowed. If they are scared, they should be! They are about to get the worst whipping of their young lives!If you do not want to make it worse, then stay out of the way!"

"Uncle Steve, Please!" Sam had been silent, but now she started to panic as well. "I knew how upset Dan and Matt were earlier. I saw it on their faces, but I didn't say anything to Jess because I wanted the time alone with her. If I had just told her, we would have stayed. Then this never would have happened! You see? We could have stopped it, so it is our fault! Please Uncle Steve!" Sam was nearly hysterical and all the boys were crying hard again too, now. They had ceased to walk and turned to face us as my shouts became more desperate and now Matt made his way back to us as my father turned to face Sam, and Dan, free for the moment, drew me into his arms.

"Shhh . . . it's all right," my brother soothed through his own sobs. It's not your fault or Sam's. It's mine. I made the bad choices. Please don't feel guilty. I can't take it."

"Sam," my father started as Matt reached her and wrapped her in his arms. She put her face against Matt's shoulder and continued to sob. "I am going to tell you the same thing I just got finished saying to Jess! You girls are free to feel however you want about this, but that doesn't change what happened or who is ultimately responsible. All your brothers and cousins played a part and each of them has to accept responsibility to a degree. The only way you can make it easier is by staying out of the way. Now I don't suppose it would do any good to order you back to the house, so I am not going to waste my time doing so. However, the first time you interfere in any way you will only succeed in making things worse for your cousins and brothers. Do I make myself clear?" Sam nodded against Matt's chest, but was still crying too hard to answer. "Sam, answer me please. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Uncle Steve," Sam's voice was muffled, as she still did not look at my father, but he let it go and turned back to me. I looked at him from where I still had my face pressed against Dan's shoulder, and tears still slid down my cheeks.

"Jessica, do you understand me?"

"Yes, Daddy," I choked.

"Fine then. That's enough of that." He reached for Dan's arm and pulled him away again, shoving him ahead this time, and then reaching for Matt and separating him from Sam in a similar way."Go on!" He said to the boys who stopped to look at him. "What are you waiting for?" Our brothers looked anxiously once more in our direction. Then they resignedly turned and proceeded to the doors of the barn, stepped through, turned to the left and were gone. Alex and Nate followed them quietly, glancing worridly at us as they passed. My father then looked at us one more time, "Try to pull yourselves together girls! And I mean it, about staying out of the way." We were unable to respond, so after a minute, he followed our cousins and brothers.

As he disappeared, I started to shake, putting my face in my hands. I felt Sam's arms close around me and I clung to her. She was crying as hard as I was and we both sank to the ground, and leaned against the barn wall. We had followed my father that far but he had shot us a withering look as he stepped through the doors and we had not dared to follow farther.

"Sam, it is my fault!"I sobbed. "I'll never forgive myself!"

"Oh Jess! It's not your fault! The boys don't blame you!"

"I think Matt does!" I sobbed, remembering the bitterness in my cousin's voice when he had told me where Dan was.

"No he doesn't, Sweetie! Jess, the only person in this world Matt ever loved more than you, was my mother. He definitely does not blame you!!" We were both crying too hard to say more and I clung to her as I heard my father ordering the boys to sit against the far wall. Clearly he was going to lecture them first.

"God! Why can't he just get it over with?" Sam sobbed, and I clung to her even more tightly.

"I am extremely disappointed boys!" My father started. "Dan, what you did was inexcusable! Somebody could have been hurt, or even killed. . . ."

'Oh please let Dan and Matt keep their tempers,' I thought as I listened to my father's degrading, patronizing tone. At that moment a most unwelcome voice penetrated my thoughts, followed by an equally unwanted figure that emerged from the shadows.

"Well, fancy seeing the two of you here," Amy smirked at us.

"Isn't it past your bedtime?" Sam hissed.

"Now, now Samantha. That's uncharacteristically rude of you."

"Shut up, Amy!" I spat, trying to dry my tears as I looked at her. "What are you doing here?"

"The same thing as you, I imagine, even if you won't admit it." I narrowed my eyes and clenched my fists, as she continued. "I'm here to see four naughty boys get the 'worst whipping of their young lives,'" she simpered.

"Why you . . .!" Both Sam and I were on our feet again now, and I moved toward her, but Sam pulled me back.

"Jess no! It's what she wants! Don't give her the satisfaction!" My blood was boiling and it was only with great effort that I controlled myself. "You think this is funny?" Sam snapped at Amy who continued to gloat.

"Yes. I'm a little amused, I have to admit," Amy returned cooly.

"Does it mean anything at all that we all hate you?! You slime slurping,sludge sucking snake?"

"No," she answered icily, "no, not really. Since I hate you all right back. I wonder who will be first. Will your dad go youngest to oldest, oldest to youngest . . .?"

"Shut up, Amy!" Sam's temper was getting the better of her despite her advice to me.

"AND the big question," Amy continued with her infuriating smirk, "whose going to get the cane? Well, your older brother for sure," she looked at me and her smile changed to one of false sympathy. "Such a shame! Poor Dan! If only you hadn't gone out tonight . . ."

"SHUT UP!! YOU FUCKING BITCH! I HATE YOU! GET OUT OF MY FACE!" I yelled, starting to sob again as her words struck a nerve.

"And then there's Matt . . . to lie to you father! He'll probably get it too, don't you think? Poor Matt! He does always seem to be in the center of . . ."

"You BITCH!" Sam and I moved as one, taking Amy by surprise and knocking her to the ground. She started to scream, but was cut off as my hands went around her throat, and I started to choke her. "You bitch!! You do it on purpose!! I'll kill you!" I was straddling her and she was clawing at my hands. Finally, coming to my senses, I took my hands from her throat, afraid I might really kill her and she lay there gasping for air. After a minute, however, she regained her breath and then she grabbed my hair.

"OWW! OWW!LET GO!" I screamed as we rolled over, and I saw Sam jump on top of her, pulling at her fingers and trying to unclasp them from my hair. "OWWW!" I screamed as I felt large chunks of hair being pulled from my head. I slapped blindly at Amy, hoping I would not hit Sam.

"Let Go! You stupid Bitch!" I heard Sam yell at her. Finally Sam succeeded in freeing Amy's fingers and as she did so I succeeded in regaining control. I rolled over again until Sam and I were lying side by side on top of Amy. Then, I slapped her hard in the face.

"I hate you! You do this shit for fun! Just like Matt said!" She squirmed and tried to get away, but Sam and I had her pinned.

"You listen, you miserable little sloth," continued Sam, "If you do not want the rest of this summer to be completely miserable for you, you better quit making trouble," she grabbed her hair and Amy screamed. "Yeah! How's it feel?" Sam hissed. "You like that?"

"You ever been whipped, Amy?" I asked grabbing her nose hard.

"OWWW!OWWW! OWWW!" She writhed.

"You want to find out what that's like too?" I spat at her. She spat back and I slapped her again and before we knew it she had somehow wiggled out and we were once again, the three of us, engaged in a war for control, rolling around, hitting, biting, pulling hair, pinching, kicking, punching. I screamed as my head hit the ground hard and my vision blurred slightly. Then, dimly, I heard Matt's voice coming from the barn doors.

"Oh, God!" Next thing I knew strong arms were pulling me out from under Amy and lifting me to my feet. I fought my brother as he pulled me back, aiming another kick at Amy and catching her in the face.

"Jess Stop!" Dan's voice reached my ears as I flailed against him. "Stop it! That's enough!"

"I'll kill her! I'll kill her! Just let me go, Dan please!"

"Shh . . .," he lowered his voice and looked nervously at my father, who I now saw was standing right there. "I think you did a pretty good job already, kiddo. She already looks half dead to me." I collapsed against him and sobbed, and he held me tight as I pressed my face into his chest. My nose and lip felt huge and blood was coming from somewhere. Tiny drops stained Dan's shirt as I cried. Finally, after a minute, I remembered Sam and looked over to see that Matt had her folded in his arms and was talking softly to her. She looked a mess too. Her hair was everywhich way and what I could see of her left eye looked like it was starting to swell. Alex and Nate stood in the doorway of the barn. They all looked half scared, half smug and amused. My father, however, did not look amused at all.

"All right! Everybody back to the barn!You girls too! I want you where I can keep my eyes on you! And we'll talk about this later!" Amy sat up and despite the blood and bruises on her face, she still wore such a self satisfied expression that I clenched my fists and glowered at her from the safety of my brother's arms. My father was about to change things, however, as Amy got shakily to her feet and took a step towards the barn, obviously thinking my dad had meant her too. "Not you, Amy! You get your little ass back to the house, and tell your mother to get you cleaned up! But before you go, you better listen to me. Now I do not condone fighting, as all my kids know," he looked sharply at me and I shrank against Dan, "and I will deal with Jessica and Samantha about this, so you can reassure your mother on that score." Dan clutched me tighter and I clung to him. "You had a part in this too, however. In fact you had a major part, I'll warrent. I have never seen Samantha act that way towards anybody. I also overheard, along with the boys, a large part of the conversation that went on." Amy looked at the boys and turned crimson. "You came out here tonight to intentionally push buttons and needle my daughter and her cousin in what was already a very emotional situation for them! As my daughter said, you did it on purpose! I find it real interesting, Amy, that you seem to be in the center of every situation that comes up somehow, and I am letting you know now that I have got your number. I appreciate the information you gave me tonight, but tattling is not something to do for fun. If it were up to me I'd tan your hide right now too. This is your last freeby, Young Lady! Next time there is trouble in which you are involved, or in which you involve yourself, you will have your full share of the punishment. Do you understand me?"

"Yes Sir," Amy was contrite and the smirk had left her face long ago, and despite the fact that I knew Sam and I would be in big trouble, my father's speech seemed to make it worth it.

"All right! Beat it! And stay away from these guys for awhile. I don't think you're too popular in this quarter."

"Yes sir," she said, glancing at me. I shot her a look of smug hatred and she turned and stalked off to the house. As she left the thought of everything still to come made my stomach queasy and I clutched my brother even tighter.

"All right, everyone inside! Let's go!" my father commanded. Dan and I separated, but he kept his arm around me and Matt held Sam's hand as we all walked back toward the barn. I bit my lip, feeling shakey as silent tears started to trickle down my face again. I really didn't want to witness this. I had tried to follow my father before because I was still hoping to talk him out of it. I did not want to add to the humiliation my cousins and brothers were already bound to be feeling, but now it looked as if I wouldn't have a choice.

"I'm sorry, Dan," I whispered as we entered the barn.

"About what?" He looked at me.

"About being here."

He pulled me closer and tried to smile, wiping gently at my tears with his fingers. "It's ok," he returned softly. "It's nothing you haven't seen before, right?" That just made me cry harder and he squeezed my shoulder, holding me as close to him as he could.

"All right girls, find a corner somewhere and park it. The rest of you come over here." I hugged Dan hard and he clung to me.

"I'm actually glad you're here," he said, his voice cracking. Then he hugged me one more time and left me to follow our father's command. I sat down in the far corner and placed my head on my knees as my brothers and cousins lined up facing my father. Soon, Sam dropped beside me in the same position.

"I think we will dispense with the rest of the lecture, as there is not much more to say anyway," my father began. "Dan, as I said before, you acted very foolishly tonight. People could have died. The next time I catch you doing something that stupid, I will not only repeat the whipping you are about to get tonight, but I will take away your car keys for good! This time, you will lose them for the rest of the summer."

"But Dad!" My brother started to protest.

"Unless you'd like to lose them for good right now?" My father raised his eyebrows.

"No, Sir. I'm sorry," Dan returned miserably.

"Good. As for the rest of you, I know how close you all are to one another. That has its advantages and disadvantages. I know how you rely on each other and I'm glad of that. I also know how tough this past year has been for you all and Rob and I are working on that. However, when behavior like tonight's emerges it makes us both rethink our position. We would like you to grow up together, but not if it means you are going to encourage one another to be rude and deceitful. The kind of lies that were told tonight could have cost somebody their life. I hope you will all think about that and use better judgement in the future."

"Yes Sir," they chorused.

"Very well. Alex come out here. The rest of you turn and face the wall." My older brother and my two cousins turned to face the front wall of the barn and Alex timidly approached my father.

My dad looked at his younger son sternly. "You've earned one heck of a paddling for yourself tonight, Son. Do you understand why?" Alex tried to nod, too overcome to talk, but my father insisted on hearing his answer. "What was that? I didn't hear you."

"Yes," Alex choked, and my older brother lost it. I saw him put his hand over his face as his shoulders started to shake and I wanted to go to him, but didn't dare to move.

"Are you going to lie to me, ever again?"

"No sir," Alex squeaked.

"Good. Then come over here." My father sat down on the folding chair he had placed in the center of the barn and my younger brother inched closer to him. When he was close enough my father reached out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him to his side. "Take your pants down, Son," he commanded gently. Alex started to cry really hard as he did as he was told. "Now, Alex" my father took him by the wrist again and looked into his young son's teary green eyes, "I want something to be quite clear. The next time I ask you a direct question, I want an answer. I don't want a fib or a half truth and I definitely do not want a refusal to reply as in the case of tonight. That is called lying by omission, and it is just like telling a fib. That is why you are being punished, Alex. Do you understand?"

"Yes Sir," Alex sobbed.

"All right then, let's get it over with." My father guided my brother across his knees and settled his hand on Alex's tightly stretched white briefs. He was the only one of the four who still wore briefs and I knew he was embarrassed about that, but my older brother and cousins had still more embarrassing things to think about. My father pushed Alex's t shirt up and started to spank slow and hard, taking his time, and moving from one cheek to the other, building a slow fire in my brother's little bottom, and turning it pink as he pulled Alex's underwear tighter and continued to spank. My brother began to squirm and kick.

"Oww! Daddy owww!"He finally cried.My father continued to spank faster and harder, keeping the same rhythm. Occasionally, he threw in sharp slaps directly under Alex's bottom, right where he sat down, assuring that he would not be able to do so comfortably for a very long while. Alex began to wail and really dance on my father's lap as his bottom glowed ever brighter. "No Daddy, PLEASE!" He sobbed. "I'm sorry!"

"I'm sorry too, but you have to learn your lesson, Son. When you behave badly you get your bottom spanked, and tonight, you behaved very badly. We are just getting started." All my cousins were crying now as well as my older brother, and I hid my face on my knees again. My younger brother's punishment continued for quite some time. In fact it seemed like an eternity to me. My father spanked him over his underwear with the same rythmic, slap, slap, slap for at least ten more minutes. He then, much to my little brother's dismay, slipped his fingers in the waistband of Alex's underwear, lowering them and continuing the punishment until every inch of Alex's bottom was a deep tomato red. When my father finally let him up he danced from side to side, sobbing and trying to rub out the sting, no longer concerned about preserving his dignity. Now, he cared only about alleviating the fire in his bottom.

"All right, Son. Now, go get the paddle."

"But Daddy, it already hurts so much! Please!"

"Alex, I told you in the beginning what your punishment would be. Now if you argue with me, I may decide you need a longer warm up. Go and get the paddle!" Resignedly Alex stepped out of his jeans and underpants, and leaving them in a heap on the floor, made his way with bitter sobs to the wall of the barn where the paddle hung.

The barn had, for several years, been a frequent if not exclusive place of punishment for me and my brothers, and the nasty school style paddle with holes drilled in it was just one of the implements that hung there. My backside was very familiar with that paddle, I could almost feel the burn and the terrible throbbing pain that came later, and my heart ached for my little brother as he took it from the wall with trembling hands. I glanced at my older brother and knew he was having similar thoughts, as his shoulders continued to quietly shake. We had been on the receiving end of that paddle, far many more times than Alex had.

My father stood up and held out his hand as Alex came slowly back. Alex gave him the paddle and my father gestured to the chair. Alex obediently placed his hands on the seat, knowing now, that it was best not to argue. "So, Alex, what have we learned?" He inquired as he placed the smooth wood of the paddle against my younger brother's burning bottom. "What does it mean to lie by omission?"

"It means not to say anything even when you really do know what's going on," Alex sobbed.

"That's right, Son," my father returned gently, as he raised the paddle. "Did you do that tonight?"

"Yes, Sir," Alex sobbed. WHACK! The paddle thudded into him. "OWW! One Sir," my brother knew enough to count, without being told.

"That's right, Alex, you did. Are you sorry?"

"Yes Sir!"

"Good! Say it!" WHACK!

"Two, Sir!I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!!" WHACK! WHACK! "Three Sir! OWW! FOUR! I'm Sorry!"

"I'm glad to hear it, Alex! Now, don't get me wrong. I do understand the position you were in. Matt and Dan put both you and Nate in an awful spot!" Dan and Matt started to cry harder. "As the oldest, however, Nate should have been able to handle himself better. I, naturally, do not expect the same of you. What I want you to get out of tonight is a clear understanding of what it means to lie by omission." WHACK! WHACK!

"Five, Sir!OWWW!Six, OWWW! OWWW!" Alex sobbed.

"I am convinced now, that you understand what that means. The last thing I need from you tonight, Alex, is a promise to never do it again. Can you make me that promise?"

"Yes, Sir! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

"Good! Let me hear it."

"I promise, Sir, that I will never again lie by omission!"

"Your apology is accepted, Son, and I will hold you to your promise!" With that my father really lit into my younger brother, making him dance from side to side, clenching the chair to keep from breaking his position. WHACK! WHACK! WHACK!

"Seven! Eight! Nine! OWW!! OWWW . . .Oh, please, Sir!" Alex wailed. The last lick landed forcefully, aimed right at the place that would hurt most when he sat down.

"Ten!" He shrieked, and he shot up, grabbing his bottom and sobbing.

"All right, Alex! Remember this, if you ever become tempted to lie to me again, because I will have no problem taking your pants down and repeating the lesson, and next time you will get what your brother and cousins are about to get. For now, go on! You are excused. I see no reason to put you through anymore punisment tonight, so get yourself back to the house while I deal with Dan and your cousins!" Alex did not wait for a second invitation, but bent to pull on his underwear and jeans, and then quickly limped towards the door, weeping and snapping his jeans as he went. I watched him go with blurry eyes and part of me wanted to go after him. I followed him as far as the door, but then thought it was better to leave him alone. I suspected he would not go back to the house and, knowing where he probably would go, I reached up and flipped the switch controlling the flood light over Gypsy's paddock. I then turned to meet the guilt ridden gaze of my older brother. Tears were coursing down his face and I instinctively crossed the floor and took him in my arms. He buried his face against my shoulder and sobbed.

"Shhh . . ." I soothed. "He's all right. He's going to be all right. He just needs some time."

"It's all my fault, Jess! What the hell was I thinking? They tried to stop me, you know! They all tried to stop me! But I was just so cock sure of myself! God!I'm an Asshole!"

"No you're not, Sweetie!You just made a mistake! Like Matt said earlier, I'm sure we all would have made different descisions, if we'd known this would happen, but we can't go back. Stop beating yourself up! They were responsible for their choices just as you were for yours and I was for mine. Any one of them could have spoken up at any time, knowing you wouldn't blame them if they did."

"I wish they had! Alex is going to hate me now!"My brother sobbed.

"Dan, now Stop it!" I pulled away and gently forced my brother to look at me, cupping his face in my hands as I did so. "Alex is never going to hate you! He adores you! That's why he kept silent tonight. He couldn't bare to think of you being in trouble! That hasn't changed!" I hugged him again and he put his head back on my shoulder, as I stroked his hair, and held him tight.

"Jess!" My father's voice snapped me back to reality, and I suddenly became aware that everybody was watching us. "You are interfering! I did not bring you in here to sooth your brother's conscience! If he feels guilty, that's good! He should! I brought you in here, because I know I can't trust you to be anywhere near Amy right now! So, get your ass back to the corner, and let me get on with this please!"

"I'm sorry, Dad!" I choked, holding my brother tighter all the same.

"NOW!" He yelled. I had a hard time pulling away as my brother clung to me, and timidly Sam came behind me and put a hand on my shoulder, tugging gently and trying to coax me away. Finally, after hugging Dan one last time, and kissing his forehead, I allowed Sam to separate us. She put her arm around me and guided me toward the corner of the barn where we had been sitting, and as we passed him, Matt grabbed my hand and squeezed it. He and Sam had been deeply affected and now it was only Nathan who was able to maintain some of his composure.

My father surprised us all by calling him next. That could only mean one thing. Nate would receive a less severe punishment than Matt, tonight, despite being older. My father usually went from youngest to oldest and, consequently, from least severe punishment to most severe. Sam started to sob harder as the full weight of the realization hit her and I felt sick to my stomach. I placed my arm around her now, as we sank to the floor again and she buried her face against my chest as Nate walked over to my father and stood before him, looking him in the eye. "I see no need, Nathan," my father started "to explain to you what you did wrong. You know what it is to lie by omission and you did it anyway. You have, therefore, earned yourself thirty licks of the strap on your bare bottom. Take your pants down." There were audible gasps from Dan, and Matt and even Nathan seemed pale and a little shaken as he obeyed my father's orders. My father indicated the chair that Alex had just been leaning on and my cousin dutifully bent over it, grabbing the front legs as he did so. The strength of the grip he appeared to have on the chair, belied the little bit of confidence he had seemed to show before. My father now came up behind him and lowered his underwear past his knees. "Count the strokes," he instructed as he unbuckled his belt and slid it through the loops.

"Yes Sir," Nate replied, trying to keep his voice steady. My father was relentless with my oldest cousin. He did very little talking and consequently the only noise to be heard was the SLAP, SLAP of the belt as it struck Nathan's bare skin. Nate was the steady one, the tough one, the one we all relied on. It was hard to see him so humiliated, and Sam was devastated. She never once lifted her head from my shoulder, as the belt cut wickedly into her older brother. By the time the last ten strokes came, Nate was crying as hard as Alex had been and having trouble staying in position. He barely managed to stay down and when my father finally let him up he began to rub right away, trying to sooth the sting as Alex had done. His sobs were very audible by that time and they left us all feeling stunned.

"All right, Matthew! Get over here!" My dad ordered as he sent Nate off to the corner. Matt attempted to face my father bravely, but I could tell he was barely holding it together as he crossed the floor to the center of the barn. "Well, hot shot, what do you have to say for yourself?" My dad inquired. Matt looked at the ground and didn't say anything. "Well?" My father pressed.

"I don't know," Matt retorted as he tried to keep his voice steady. "Nothing, I guess."

"Nothing? Son, you told me a bold faced lie tonight."

"Yes sir," Matt barely managed. "I just didn't want Dan to get in trouble." My brother, who had collected himself slightly after Alex's punishment, started to cry again.

"Well, that certainly backfired, didn't it?" My father pushed.

"Yes, sir. I suppose so."

"You suppose so," my father mocked. "You got a little lippy with me tonight too, Matt, when I very correctly questioned the story you were telling me."

"Yes, sir. I'm sorry."

"In fact you and Jess have both been copping pretty big attitudes since the day you arrived. Why is that?" I hugged my knees and sobbed, and I felt Sam's arm come around me. Matt looked at the ground and remained silent. "Well, let me ask you this," My father softened his voice, "do you think you deserve to be punished?" Matt shrugged, and still didn't speak, but I could tell he was losing control. "Well, do you agree with my wife? What would your mother have said about all this?"

"Daddy, how could you?!" I screamed, jumping to my feet.

"Don't, Jess, you'll make it worse!" Sam tried to pull me back down, but I resisted and continued to shout at my father.

"How can you ask him that!? You want to know why he has an attitude? Why I have an attitude? It's because of Cynthia and her little snot daughter! Can't you see how they treat him?"

"Jessica! I am tired of the backtalk from the two of you, of the disrespect and the tantrums! And I am sick to death of warning you about interfering tonight! You and I will do plenty of talking later! Right now I am addressing your cousin! Be so good as to let him answer!"

"You are being so unfair!!" I screamed and stamped my foot as my father turned his attention back to Matt. Sam tugged on my arm again and this time succeeded in pulling me down beside her, and placing her arm around me. I sobbed as my father continued to stare at Matt and silently, with a surreptitious glance at my father, my older brother left his place and made his way over to us. It was with some relief, I think, that Sam made room for him, and he sat down and put his arm around me. My father was too focused on my cousin to note my brother's change of location. Matt, meanwhile, had still not said anything, but this time my father was not going to let him off.

"Matthew, I'm waiting."

He took a deep breath and finally looked up at my father, "Well," he sobbed, "I reckon Aunt Sara's right. I guess, for once Mom would have agreed that we needed to have our bottoms whipped. That's exactly how she would have put it too, I reckon." Nate had been looking at the ceiling this whole time in an effort not to cry, as he continued to face the wall, with his pants around his ankles and his blistered bottom on display, but now he began to sob, leaning against the wall and trying to hide his face against his arm, as his shoulders shook.

"Well, Matt," my father's voice was almost gentle, "that is the most mature thing I've heard you say since you got here. To tell you the truth, if you were my son, I'd take your pants down and blister your bottom with the strap every night for the rest of the summer until you learned to think before opening your mouth! You and Jessica have both been asking for a good hiding since the summer began, and now I am going to use this opportunity to remind you of some basic rules concerning respect and the practice of good manners. Go on and take your pants down, son." With shakey hands, Matt did as he was told and my father indicated the chair. Matt once again obeyed, bending tremulously over the chair and gripping the legs, as his brother had done just a few minutes before. My father folded his belt again, and addressed my cousin from the left side of the chair. "Matthew, I am going to give you twelve licks with my belt over your boxers. Then, you will bear your bottom, Son, for twelve strokes of the cane."

"NO!!" Sam and I both cried out in involuntary horror and I tried again to get to my feet, but this time my brother kept me beside him. "It's so unfair, Dan!! It's so unfair!!" I sobbed.

"I know Jess, but you can't help him! Don't get yourself in any more trouble. The only thing that could make this worse for Matt or any of us now, is if you and Sam get in more trouble. Please!!" I continued to sob and he stroked my hair, gently. "It will all be over in a few minutes, and he'll be ok, you'll see," my brother soothed.

"But it will be even worse for you!" I clutched him and my stomach turned at the thought. He put both arms around me and kissed the top of my head, unable to respond. Nate and Dan had, of us all, received the most strokes from the cane, the time they mouthed off to my father and uncle. I could still hear their cries in my head, but they had received only ten strokes apiece. Those had been on the seat of their pants, and they had had no additional punishment beforehand.

I hid my eyes as my father raised the belt, and instructed Matt to count, but no matter how hard he tried, my brother could not drowned out my father's strict tones. "You will not disrespect me in my own house, Matthew!" I heard the swish of the belt and clutched harder at Dan. SMACK! The belt made contact and I could only imagine the sting as I heard Sam scream.

"One Sir!" Matt managed after a minute. Sam was crying really hard again now, and Dan responded by placing an arm around her. She hid her face too and we waited, listening to my father as he scolded my cousin.

"You will not talk back to me!" SMACK!

"Oww!! Sir! That's two!"

"You will not lie to me!!!" SMACK!

This time Matt could not answer right away, and when he did his voice shook "Three Sir! I'm sorry!"

"You will try to get along with your stepsister and stepmother and if you cannot, you will at least be polite to them!!" SMACK!!

"GOD!OWWW!"Matt cried. "That's Four!!"

"Watch your tongue, Matt, or I will take your underwear down right now!!"

"Yes Sir! Sorry Sir!" My cousin sobbed, unable to hold back any longer.

"You will do as you're told and you and Jessica will make an effort to be pleasant to everyone, not just each other and your closest siblings! Is that clear?"

"Yes Sir!" Matt sobbed.

"Good!" SMACK, SMACK, SMACK! My father fired the next three in succession and Matt screamed, leaping up and covering his bottom. I lifted my face from my brother's shoulder as I heard my cousin scream, but I quickly hid it again as my father roughly took Matt's arm and repositioned him over the chair.

"Those licks will be repeated now, Young Man! If you move again, your underwear will come down and remain down for the rest of your punishment. Furthermore, the strokes will be repeated until you have counted them all, and if necessary, I will have your brother or cousin hold you in place. Is that clear?"

"Yes Sir! I'm sorry Sir!" My cousin's voice was so choked that I could barely understand his words.

"Oh, Jesus Christ!" I heard my brother mutter and I looked up just in time to see my father step back, preparing to deliver the strokes from a run up.

"No! Daddy! No!" I screamed. Sam looked up now too.

"Oh God, NO!"she cried, and she hid her eyes again on my brother's shoulder.

"Daddy, Please!!" I screamed again as he raised the belt in the air.

"Jess, don't look, Baby, " my brother tried to coax, but I felt paralyzed and couldn't tear my eyes away as my father took two running steps forward and brought the belt down with such force that it seemed to knock the wind out of my cousin.

"Five Sir," the words finally came out in a a strangled sob. Dan tightened his arm around me and guided my head back to his shoulder, covering my eyes with his hand and kissing the top of my head as I cried. The next three were delivered quick fire again and Matt stayed down for the first two, but the last one caught him on the thigh as he shifted slightly and without thinking he once again leapt up. "Oww!! Jesus Christ!!" He yelled.

"You get back over that chair right now, before I decide to horsewhip you!!" My father threatened. "Nate! Pull your pants up and get over here!" Nate had calmed himself since the allusion to his mother and to all appearences had born the whole scene quietly with his face hidden against his arm. Now, however, as he looked up, I saw how stricken he was, tears sliding silently down his face as he bent stiffly to pull up first his shorts and then his jeans. The grimace on his face told how painful, even this simple activity was. After buttoning his jeans, he limped to the center of the barn to face my father. "Nate," my father started "it appears that your brother cannot take this punishment without some assistance, even with his shorts up, and I am about to take those down. I need you, therefore, to hold him in place for the last six licks."

"Sir," Nate's voice was barely audible as he glanced over at me and Sam where we were still huddled on either side of my brother. "Do, you really think that's necessary?"

"Nate, if he gets up again, I will repeat the whole punishment on his bare bottom." Without another word Nate turned and walked to where Matt was crumpled over the chair, sobbing.

Nate looked briefly at us again and then spoke quietly to his brother, "Come on, Man. Let's just get it over with." Matt, still sobbing, stretched down to grab the legs of the chair again, and Nate placed his hands on his shoulders as my father came up beside them.

"I'm as good as my word, Son" my father spoke with gentle sterness as he reached up and pulled Matt's boxers down to his knees. "You had better start cooperating with me and doing as you're told." My father raised the belt again.

"You're not my dad!" Matt sobbed. SMACK!! Matt was unprepared and tried to jump up, but Nate kept him firmly in place.

"Start counting, Son, if you do not want the strokes repeated."

"Six!!" Matt choked.

"You're right." My dad continued as he raised the belt again. "I'm not your dad. But your dad and I have been in communication for a long time now, regarding your attitude and what to do about it!" SMACK!!!

"OWWW!! OWWW!! Uncle Steve!!"

"COUNT!!" Matt tried to reach back, but Nate intercepted his hand.

"Come on, Bro, hang in there," he encouraged softly.

"Seven!!" Matt sobbed, putting his hand back down.

"The truth is, Matt," my father continued, "you boys and Sam to a certain extent too, would have had a very different kind of upbringing if it weren't for your mother's influence on your father. He and I have always seen eye to eye. We got the strap from our father, whenever we stepped oout of line, and neither of us saw any reason why it shouldn't be the same for you all." SMACK, SMACK, SMACK!!!

"OWWW!! Oh Holy Shit!!!" Matt screamed as he tried once again to jump up and was once again thwarted by his brothers gentle, but firm hands.

"Watch your mouth!" My father scolded. "Since you didn't count and instead uttered an obscenity, those last three will be repeated."

"No!! Uncle Steve! Please! I'm Sorry!!" Matt cried.

"I'm sure you are, Matt! And you'll be lots sorrier too, my boy, before we're all through." He raised the belt.

"Come on Man, just count," my older cousin pleaded. SMACK, SMACK, SMACK!!!

"Eight, Nine, Ten!!" This time Matt managed to stay down, with the help of his brother, and count. My father stepped back, preparing to deliver the last two from a run up and I hid my face in Dan's shoulder, pressing my hand to my ear to try and drowned out the sound. "Eleven!" Matt shrieked and not long after "Twelve!!" My father then nodded at Nate and Nate took his hands from Matt's shoulders. Matt leapt to his feet, crying and immediately tried to rub the burn from his bottom.

My father shook his finger in his face as he was hopping around and admonished "You and your brother, especially, have had far fewer spankings growing up than you would have if you were my boys. Your father knew your mother's feelings about spanking when they married, but had always thought that as long as he handled it, he'd be able to discipline you as he liked. He did not count on her opposing him so strongly. The consequence of this was that you and Nate got away with a lot more than your father would have liked. So, let me tell you this now, my boy. You can cry all you want, but your father will not help you. He feels you have had this coming for a long time, and Matthew, if I have to take your pants down and spank you every night this summer, I will cure you of your attitude! Is that understood?"

"Yes sir," Matt sobbed. He was standing still now, but continued to rub.

"Good. Dan!" My father looked where my brother was supposed to be and was surprised to see he was not there.

"Sir?" Dan spoke timidly from where he still sat between me and Sam.

"Who told you to move?" my father growled. "That was a mistake! As you are the only one who can still bend properly, for the moment, please go to the loft and drop down six bales of hay."

"Why?" Dan asked, confused.

"Just do it, Dan!" my father barked.

"Yes sir," my brother responded, and he got quickly to his feet, giving my shoulder a last squeeze. He pulled the rope ladder down and climbed into the loft. He opened the trap door and a minute later a bale of hay thudded to the floor of the barn. It wasn't long before five more followed. My father started dragging and stacking them and as my brother climbed down, he was placing the last one in its place. He had stacked them in piles of three directly beside one another. Now he picked up the cane and turned to face Matt and my brother ominously.

He turned his glare first on Dan, but my brother looked away, so my father looked at Matt, "Take your shorts off, Son, all the way." Matt reddened and looked over at me and Sam, but he did as he was told, not daring to disobey. He chose to present us with the rear rather than the front view and as he did so, the angry wheels left by the belt became more visible, and I put my hand to my mouth as tears rolled down my face. "Dan," my father called my brother again.

"Sir?"The tremor in Dan's voice revealed his growing anxiety.

"Get over here, please, and help me out. I've got a feeling your cousin is going to need some extra assistance."

"But Dad . . .!" Matt was crimson now as my brother glanced at him, and then tried to plead his case to my father.

"Daniel, I know what you are going to say! I do not want to hear about whose fault it is! Just get over here!" Dan looked again at Matt with sympathetic resignation, as he walked slowly over to stand across from my older cousin. My father then turned back to Matt, "Go on, Son," he directed gently. Matt started to cry really hard again and I had never seen him so red, as he shuffled over to where Nate and Dan stood on either side of the hay bales. He was trying to keep his front covered by pulling his t shirt lower and he barely managed to do so, but his bottom was now fully exposed. He stopped and looked at Dan again as he reached them, and Dan turned red too, and looked away.

"I'm so sorry, Man," he apologized again, and he bit his lip, trying to maintain his composure for my cousin's sake.

"Go on Matt," my father's voice was stern but gentle, "I think this is going to do you a lot of good." Matt was no longer even trying to keep it together, as he stretched himself over the hay bales, reaching for the far edge and rendering his previous efforts to cover up more useless than ever. Dan and Nate placed their strong hands on his arms and shoulders, holding him gently, but firmly in place. They were both having a hard time keeping it together now, especially as Matt went completely to pieces.

"Imagine it's me, Matt!" Dan tried to sooth, his voice breaking. "Just imagine it's me, Bud. It will be, shortly anyway."

Witnessing this overall scene and the interaction between Matt and our older brothers was pushing both me and Sam to the edge, though, right at the moment I was so paralyzed by my own horror of the situation, that I barely noticed how much it was affecting her. We were on our feet again now as my father raised the cane, laying it against Matt's exposed bottom, taking careful aim. "Daddy!" I screamed as I saw my cousin's bottom clench in anticipation.

My father was unaffected as he drew back his arm. "Don't forget to count, Matthew! We are going to twelve!"

The cane swished through the air and I hid my face in my hands as it cut into my cousin. There was a long pause before Matt got enough breath to say "One . . .Sir!" His voice was almost inaudible. When I looked up again, I saw that he had his face buried in the hay and his fingers clenched tightly in it. I knew his scratched fingers would bother him later, almost as much as his bruised bottom and I hid my face again, crying harder.

"What are you being punished for, Matt?" My father demanded, running the edge of the cane along the mark he had just made.

"Lying, I guess, " Matt sobbed.

"Lying, you guess?" My dad drew his arm back again and the cane snapped through the air a second time, creating another mark just above the fitrst one.

"Oww!! Oh, god!" he cried. I saw my cousin's hands clench and I knew that he would have reached if Dan and Nate were not holding him in place. "That's two," he choked.

"You had better start calling me Sir, Matthew! Are you feeling more sure now?"

"Yes, Sir. I'm sorry, Sir! I know I lied. I'm sorry!"

"Well, that's more like it," my dad replied, drawing his arm back again. "Would you do it again?"

"I don't know, Sir," Matt replied without thinking.

"You don't know?" My father paused. "What if Jess or Sam got into some similar situation? Would you tell me?"

"That is not a fair question, Dad!" I screamed.

"Why not?" My dad yelled back, looking over at me. "Why is that not fair?"

"Because you know how we all feel about one another!! It is not fair to ask him about situations that have not yet occured! He made a mistake!"

"That's right! He made a mistake!" My dad shouted, really losing his temper. "He made a really BIG mistake. Never again do I want to hear that one of you is involved in something that endangers your lives and others and that the rest of you knew about it and didn't tell me!! Am I making myself clear??" We were all crying too hard to answer, so my dad turned his attention back to Matt. "I am still waiting for an answer, Matthew!"

"I don't know, I honestly don't know! I just wasn't thinking!" My cousin sobbed.

"That is the problem, Matt! You don't think! You never think! I do appreciate the honesty, but that is not the answer I was looking for, Young Man!"

"OWWWW!!!!" Matt cried as the cane bit into him again, marking him above and below the previous places. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!!!"

"Count, Man!!" My brother reminded.

"Three! Four!" Matt sobbed at the last minute. My dad fired the next three strokes in rapid succession. "OWWW, OWWW, OWWW!! GOD IT HURTS! " My cousin screamed, trying to jump up. Nate and Dan fought to keep him down.

"Hang in there, Bro!" Nate sobbed.

"You gotta remember to count, Matt!" My brother tried once again to appease my father with the reminder, but this time it did not work.

"Since you can't remember to count, Matthew, those strokes will have to be repeated. I am also still waiting for an answer to my question. You have the rest of your punishment to think about it."

"Come on, Man! Just tell him what he wants to hear," Dan advised. My cousin was sobbing hard and didn't respond. Meanwhile my father raised the cane once more.

"FIVE! SIX! SEVEN!! Holy Shit, it hurts!!" Matt tried to jump up again as the strokes all landed in previously marked places, but Matt and Nate succeeded in keeping him down. I could tell how much it was costing them emotionally to do so.

"You do have a mouth on you, Matt. One more time, now, without the obscenity at the end."

"NO!! GOD! Please stop, Uncle Steve!!" I suddenly became aware again of Sam as she cried out. My father ignored her and drew the cane back once more. "No!!" Sam screamed again and before I could stop her, she dashed forward. My brother was quicker, however, and he left Matt's side, catching Sam in his arms and pushing her back. Matt immediately tried to reach with his free hand, but Nate intercepted it.

"Hang in there, Matty! You've got to hang in there!"

"Let me go, Dan!" Sam yelled, struggling to break free. "He has had enough! It's not fair!"

"What are you going to do, Sammi?" My brother sobbed. "You've got to let it go, Sweetie! Let him get this over with!"

"It's not fair! It's not fair!!!" Sam sobbed, beating her fists against my brother's chest until finally she collapsed against him. He held her tight, letting his chin fall to the top of her head and kissing her gently as he blocked her view of Matt and Nate.

"We have to get you through this, Bro" Nate said quietly to Matt, as he watched the scene between Dan and Sam, "for the girls' sake as well as yours." I was distracted and did not see the cane as it swished through the air again, but I heard it.

"Five! Six! SEVEN!! Owww!!" Matt managed to stay down and count, but the effort left him crumpled in a sobbing heap, his fists balled in the hay at the end of the bale.

"That was much better!" my dad approved, giving Matt a moment to recover. "After the next three, Matt, I am going to ask my question again and I want you to use this time to think about how you are going to answer it. Ok?"

"Yes Sir, " my cousin sobbed.

My father drew back his arm and Nate tightened his grip on his brother's shoulders. "Stay down, Bud. Stay down and count. It's almost over." Matt was crying too hard to answer, but he nodded into the hay to show he had heard.

"You will not Lie to me, Matthew! Regardless of the circumstances!" CRACK!

"EIGHT!" Matt managed in a strangled voice.

"You will respect me and all the people in my household, even those you do not care for, and especially our guests!" CRACK!

"Nine!" Matt whimpered.

"You will watch your mouth and your attitude in general from now on, or we will be having another conversation very like this one!" CRACK!

"Owww!!" Matt sucked in his breath. "TEN!! Owww!! Umm. . . Oh . . . OWWW! Uncle Steve!"

"Is that clear?"

"Yes Sir! Ok! I'm sorry! I'm sorry, Sir!" He sobbed.

"Good! We're doing well. So? What are we not going to do, Matthew?" My father questioned, stepping back and preparing for the last two strokes.

"Lie, swear, or act disrespectfully, Sir, to you or anyone else."

"Good, good! You're learning," my father replied giving the cane a practice swish through the air, making both Matt and Nate tense.

"Now, back to my question. Are you going to lie Young Man, ever again? Even to protect your cousins or sister or brother? Think carefully," he cautioned as he drew the cane back once more.

Matt, for the first time, hesitated. "Come on Bro," Nate encouraged, "it's almost over." Still Matt didn't say anything, and tearfully I made my way over to where my cousins were, afraid that Matt was about to prolong his punishment still more.

"Matthew, I'm waiting!" My father commanded as I dropped to my knees in front of him. His face was hidden in the hay, but he looked up at me as I placed my hand on the back of his head, stroking his hair. I tried to smile and I caressed his wet cheek as tears filled his big blue eyes.

"It's ok, Matt! Please just tell him what he wants to hear. I will never put you in the position my brother did." My voice was low, so Dan would not hear what I said. I did not want to add to the guilt he was already feeling. "You know us," I continued fondly through my tears, "we find trouble together. No split decisions to worry about here. Nate, you know can take care of himself. Sam and Alex never get in trouble unless we drag them down with us, and you can bet Dan will never do this ever again. So, please just make the promise, ok? We can all fend for ourselves." Matt started to cry really hard again, but he nodded, and I kissed his forehead, making Nate lose it completely.

"Well, Matthew?"

"Sir, I will never lie to you again. Not to protect Dan, Alex, my brother, or even Jessica and Sam." Matt's voice caught in his throat as he tried to control himself, and succeeded only in becoming more worked up.

"I'm glad you've come to your senses, Matt," my father replied slashing the cane through the air again. I saw the terror in my cousin's face and I took his hands in mine as my father continued, "these will be the last two strokes, if you stay down and count them."

"Hold on to me!" I said softly, and Matt gripped my hands hard as my father stepped back again and, starting from a run up, delivered the last two strokes of Matt's punishment, cutting him right under his bottom. I felt my cousin's nails dig into my hands, but between me and Nate, we kept him from breaking position.

"Eleven! Twelve!" He exclaimed. "Oh Holy Jesus!" He gasped under his breath.

"It's over Matt!" I choked, "It's over!Just take a deep breath." He did so, and started to sob hard as Nate removed his hands from his shoulders, placing them instead over his own face and collapsing into sobs as well. All the strength he had mustered for Matt's sake had finally failed him. Sam left my brother's protective arms, then, seeking to console her older brother and I got to my feet, keeping hold of Matt's hands. Matt made room for me on the end of the haybale, and I sat down, gathering my cousin's face to my lap and letting him cry as I brushed strands of hair from his hot, sticky face. I took the opportunity then to really survey the damage and the sight of Matt's broken, and blistered skin made my stomach turn. I placed my hand gently on his back, trying to soothe him, and then I caught the eyes of my brother, standing alone now. I could tell he was terrified and terror gripped me too as the realization hit me that his turn for punishment had come.

My father, still grasping the cane in one hand, came up behind Dan and took him hard by the arm, causing my brother to grimace. My father leaned close to him and spoke so low that I barely caught what he said, “You, my boy, are in as much trouble as you are ever going to be in." He pointed at Matt, and my brother miserably followed his gaze, "That is your fault!" My father then pointed in Sam and Nate's direction, and Dan's eyes, now filled with tears, once again followed his. "That is your fault!" Then my father looked back at Dan, "And somewhere around here is a thirteen year old boy who adores his big brother just a little too much, who for his loyalty has been rewarded with a very sore, very red bottom, and that is your fault too!"

"I know, Dad. I'm sorry!" my brother sobbed.

"I'm glad to hear it! We are about to see just how sorry!" my father tightened his grip and proceeded to haul my older brother towards the back of the barn.

"Daddy!" I wailed.

"Stay with your cousins, Jessica!" my father cautioned.

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